Thursday, January 9, 2014

New Year!!

Well… after almost a year, I’m back!  2013 was a very hard year for me and it honestly was just hard to put the effort into my blog posts.  I thought about it A LOT – and I missed it.  I have very few followers so I knew it wasn’t really an issue.  I do these posts as a way to get the words out.  I have no main focus…just use it as an outlet to talk.

2013 in hindsight was a great learning experience for me.  The year started off with the passing of my grandfather—which was really hard.  I’ve never had a member of my family that I was around a lot to pass away.  It was so nice though to learn more about him after his death though.  It’s honestly such an honor to have had him as a grandfather.  That’s the only way I know of to put into words how I feel.  He was a man that cared so much for his family – every.single.member.  I still cry when I think of him, but it’s not out of sadness.  I’m just grateful to have had the privilege of knowing him.

In 2013 I grew as a mother.  I have a daughter that is 6 going on 13 and that has provided its own set of challenges this year.  I honestly feel like I am the least qualified person to raise daughters… and somehow I ended up with 2.  If you know me, I am an information hog.  I’m constantly reading blogs and reading other peoples perspectives on life issues.  I’m open-minded and follow blogs of both christian and non-christian mothers.  I’m in a unique situation.  I don’t have any close friends that have kids in the same order I do: boy (8), girl (6) and girl (18 months).  I’ve found myself really needing help navigating situations with my oldest daughter, but no one I’m comfortable talking with would understand.  I can’t just talk with other mothers that have 3 kids because their kids don’t follow in the same order.  Having a middle child that is a daughter is hard.  I constantly find myself thinking about how to approach things where she won’t get her feelings hurt.  My son, he’s a breeze.  Nothing bothers him – really ever.  He cares very much about obeying the rules and getting the approval of his parents.  Even when he’s in trouble, he learns from it and shakes it off.  We have to handle our daughters with more care though.

I grew up in how I handle my relationships in 2013.  I became choosey in who I share information with.  I can really only think of 2 people that I really share details of my life with.  Talking about any issues with people that really don’t understand, and offer generic advice, makes no sense.  Now don’t get me wrong…I have many friends and I value those relationships VERY much.  I’m just talking about being choosey in those I trust with information.  I think it’s important to be that way.  I’m not interested in feedback from someone who has no experience in my situation – because they just don’t know….and that’s okay!  THIS was the hardest challenge for me.

I ended the year on a great note though!  My heart has been so full of expectation for the upcoming year.  I walked through a test the last few months and once I felt the release in my heart I was just immediately full of optimism for the new year!  I truly felt like I shut the door on the last year and was able to shake it off the second the new year began.  It’s honestly THE absolute best.feeling.ever.

At our church we are currently in a time of fasting – 21 days of fasting and prayer.  I have looked so forward to it because I truly believe the Lord wants to give direction for our family this year.  There are things in my heart that I have been mulling over and I’m just so happy to get some clarification and direction.  I truly believe that there are some big things on the horizon for our family this year and it’s exciting!  I’m not the least bit nervous or scared – just excited. J

So here’s to a new year sweet followers!  Believing your 2014 is the best.year.yet.

Much love!
Jen

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